07.18.07 Labeled Naturally
It’s so much easier to label than to listen.
Today has been a day of low grade friction. Sparing you the details is easy because the details don’t make me look so good.
When criticized I naturally check one of the following correct answers beneath the question below in my mind:
This person is ________________.
A) conservative
B) liberal
C) prude
D) licentious
E) cynical
F) critical
G) hypocritical
H) stupid
I) mean
J) shallow
K) arrogant
L) judgmental
M) weird
Once you’re labeled your words are much easier to dismiss or dismantle. And so are you.
keith said:
N) neo-hippy
thecachinnator said:
They also stop being people completely, which is rather convenient.
Tim said:
I could not agree more. When we label someone, we have made a category in which we can better understand what is wrong with that individual. It is a shame that we wrong not only that individual but also ourselves into thinking that we have this right in order to do so. Thanks for your honesty.
Michael Krahn said:
I think this t-shirt would be a good fit for you:
http://tinyurl.com/yq4vxs
MamasBoy said:
Shaun,
At least you are willing to admit this and try to improve. Most people aren’t and I don’t know anybody who doesn’t struggle with this at some level.
I think it is human nature to try to justify ourselves and this can easily take the form of cutting others down when they disagree with us. It is much easier than actually engaging the criticism and trying to learn from it because so often people don’t know us all that well and have made judgments beyond their understanding of the situation/person. It can be hard to look at the criticism objectively and try to separate the wheat from the chaff. This is especially true if the person doing the criticizing isn’t being nice about it. To respond with grace and humility (not returning insults, etc.) and actively look for ways to learn from criticism is truly a work of the Holy Spirit.
There are some teenage twins at my church who have never impressed me and whom I sometimes looked down on. They have sometimes cut others down or been bit antisocial at gatherings. However, as I’ve come to know them better, I’ve seen that many of my early judgments of them were off-base. While I can’t justify their anti-social actions, much of it comes from a deep-seated insecurity and lack of trust in people due to being burned in the past. Given their home-life and a dad who criticizes them constantly and tells them they’ll never be as good as him, etc., they are actually doing better socially than most people would in their shoes. The kids have quite a bit of potential if they can get past the insecurity and self-doubt that has become almost embedded in their psyche. For my part, I’m disappointed in myself for judging their character so quickly before I got to know them better and hope that I can be an encouragement to them in the future to help them realize their potential.
MB