12.08.06 Cage Match
It’s the ultimate display of Jesus-powered evangelical manliness: Two alpha-male boomers enter the ring. A steel cage lowers, fencing the two warriors in for a fight to the death...or the front page of your local newspaper.
One, a complete set of Republican talking points come to life, a comedian with lightening fast lips and a die-hard commitment to never putting down a toilet seat. The other, a bearded long-haired hunter-gatherer and best-selling author, a pied piper leading an army of former Mother Teresa-like girly men in a battle of William Wallace proportions against the castration of the American church.
Two men - the manliest of men - face off for the title of “Most Testosteronic Evangelical in America.”
Every woman wants to submit to them and every man wants to pay them $68 dollars for a weekend of 80s buttrock and instruction on how to grow a pair. Who will take home the prize?
My money’s on Eldridge. He’s wiry and spry. Brody‘s got a Franklin on Stine though. The kneeless jeans give him extra mobility Brody figures. Who’s your pick?
mdaele said:
you’ve really got me
I totally have to get myself a wrestling psuedonom.
Any chance you might land a spot on Stine’s ‘worship’ team?
Aims said:
I’m goin with Stine. Sure Eldridge wrote Captivating with his wife but I gotta go with a man who can make me laugh more than one who would make me cry.
Steven said:
I;m gonna go with Rob Bell running in with the chair.
No wait. He’d never do that.
Um. I think I am going with the comic. His entrance music is so awfully bad I am afraid it would stun Eldridge with its badness and allow Stine to come off the top ropes with his patented “Testosterone Thunderkick.”
said:
How bad is this? I tried to go to Brad’s web site from my work computer and was stopped by a warning screen from my agency saying that they’d blocked his website because it was known as a site that had “malicious content.” Whoa. That was my second offense that day. Earlier I’d also tried to go to jockey.com and that was blocked because it was a site that had “lingerie and swimwear.” Yeesh. I just wanted to order some socks.
Shaun Groves said:
You work for THE MAN, Nancy, What’d you expect?
Wait. WIll that get SHLOG on the “malicious content” list?
said:
You keep that up and it will!
Then I’ll have to go bat my eyes at the techies to get your site unblocked…